I couldn’t find the teabags. I was in my own kitchen, opening cupboards like I’d never seen their contents before, like I didn’t make a pot there every single afternoon when boredom, apathy and an urge for sugar launch their three-pronged attack around 3pm. When I poured the boiling liquid…

I was browsing the cocktail menu in a hotel bar with an elaborate ceiling and steps you have to be careful descending when you exit in high heels after midnight. It doesn’t take reservations, but you will be welcomed and seated on arrival. It reminded me of church. I was…

(AKA I Am Afflicted By A Terrible Ennui) How does Bruce know? How does The Boss, a successful man with a backing band, an entourage, that voice, who is friends with Barack Obama, who is never short of a chat show invite or a hilariously heart-warming fan story, who is…

This summer, I have been a victim of blackmail or maybe it’s extortion, I can never remember the difference. I think one is a subtype of the other but regardless, I’ve been manipulated, coerced, and well and truly played. I am somewhat ashamed. I’ve also had my credit card stolen…

They weren’t one bit pleased about the cat. In fact, not pleased is a bit of an understatement. They were incandescent with rage. Most had stopped reading when the cat incident occurred. Some chose to express their anger anonymously. John M who may or may not have been using an…

I’ve been thinking a lot recently about Lucy Jordan. “Who?” said my husband when I shared how she’d been on my mind. I could see his brain whirring. Was this someone I played tennis with on Friday mornings or had bonded with whilst loitering in a school playground? Had I…

(Note: contains spoilers) We were twenty minutes past the start time which was not the actual start time but just the time when the ads would start and people would filter in at leisure with their popcorn and Coke Zero combos. As yet, there was nothing on the screen, not…

“Citronella,” he said as he set a negroni down in front of me. His head was shaved. He wore gloves and lived on the island of Murano. He made the best negronis in the world and I swore I would never put another one past my lips ever again unless…

“Dave says lots of menopausal women become selfish when their oestrogen runs out,” Linda’s husband Steve says in a phone call to his mother. “Don’t come crying to me if the kids die in an accident while you are finding yourself,” texts her sister Siobhán IN CAPS. Linda has just…